


Screaming Without Making A Sound (I'll Still Love You In The Morning)

by Slashy Goodness (allmadhere)



Category: Bandom, Fall Out Boy
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-03-27
Updated: 2010-03-27
Packaged: 2017-10-08 08:49:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,101
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/74809
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/allmadhere/pseuds/Slashy%20Goodness
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was perfect in every way: perfectly picturesque, as the paparazzi were surely proving, and perfectly serene and perfectly romantic. Really, what more could he ask for on Valentine's Day?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Screaming Without Making A Sound (I'll Still Love You In The Morning)

**Author's Note:**

> This is my fic for thebigexchange and it's for cieluna, who is my favorite person right now. Because I am totally a queen of prompts (blatant lie), I got in somewhere between 2-3 prompts (depends on how you look at it). Go figure. Probably not nearly as emo as the title makes it sound, as I am a giant bucket of sap.

Patrick smiled softly to himself as he and Pete ambled slowly through the park and followed the meandering paths under the trees. Pete was pushing a stroller with Bronx in it as the baby burbled happily and tried to catch the few snowflakes fluttering lazily the air. It was perfect in every way: perfectly picturesque, as the paparazzi were surely proving, and perfectly serene and perfectly romantic. Really, what more could he ask for on Valentine's Day?

Maybe, if he closed his eyes for long enough, he could forget that he and Pete were only friends and nothing more. He wasn't sure when it had started but he sure as hell knew when he finally realized he had a crush on his bassist/lyricist/best friend. It had been after one of their earlier shows right before they really took off, after slowly dying under those hot stage lights and pouring his soul into the words and melody he and Pete had constructed. Pete had thrown him this mega-watt smile that made everything afterwards look like it was being filtered and he had blushed. It wasn't just his normal, enormous, tooth-bearing grin either. It had been something more. It had to have been, or Patrick would have absolutely no idea how to take everything that came afterwards. Thank god the heat from the stage let him pass off the rush of blood to his face.

For the rest of that tour, he'd tried to find every little imperfection and nuance that could drive him up the wall and make him hate Pete but everything turned into something he loved. The fact that he talked too much meant that he let all sorts of little truths slip out, even when not inebriated. The fact that he could barely sleep without sound flowing around him meant that he turned to Patrick for a soothing lullaby. The fact that he felt the need to stand so close when talking meant that Patrick didn't have to try hiding how much he wanted to be close and make things awkward. The fact that his smiles made the entire world brighter meant everything.

So Patrick took the moment and enjoyed it. Besides, he was doing a favor for Ashlee, which he didn't mind at all. Anyone who had guessed at how he felt about Pete would think he resented or even hated her but they couldn't be more wrong. Ashlee was good for Pete in so many ways that he couldn't even begin to count. She hadn't force Pete to drop his friends and band the second the ring was on her finger either, which was a plus. They even looked good together and had produced a beautiful baby boy. He was just envious of them and how couldn't he be? They had what he wanted and could never have, purely by virtue of them having it. If he were the sort to wreck homes and lives, this would be the thing he'd do it for because he wanted Pete so much.

"Hey, 'Trick, you okay?" Pete laid a gentle hand on his shoulder and squeezed, just a bit. It drew Patrick out of his morose musings and back into his perfect moment. Patrick smiled, maybe a little sadly but he smiled all the same. Pete gave him that wonderful smile again and he melted, like he always did. "Come on, let's head back. I'm tired of being photographed." He glared over his shoulder and Patrick swore he heard leaves rustle in response.

"Sure," Patrick replied genially, ready to agree to anything Pete asked him at all. "Wait, no!" He looked stricken and Pete turned to him, concern shining in those beautiful hazel eyes. "We can't yet, right? It's Bronx's first Valentine's and all he's done is grab at some snow. We should make this memorable, right?"

"Yeah!" Pete agreed and Patrick heaved a sigh of relief. He'd promised Ashlee he'd keep Pete away from home long enough for her to prepare whatever surprise she had up her sleeves and would required him to probably babysit for the night. He'd rather not think about it, really, since it always made him fall into a bit of a funk. "Let's go to that new candy store and pick out something for Ashlee's Valentine!"

Patrick willed his voice not to crack. "What? You mean you still haven't brought her anything? She's your wife, dude, mother of your son and all that. Shouldn't she have been the first person you got a Valentine for?"

"No," he answered simply, "because she would have found it and ruined the surprise." He paused. "Should... should I get her flowers or something instead? Is that too cliche?"

"It's you, Pete. You're a walking romantic cliche and you can't do anything about it. Flowers and chocolate will be fine. I'd say get a ring but you've sort of passed the proposal stage already and it'd be a little pointless." Pete beamed at him and Patrick felt his heart break a little more. He'd bury it and torture himself about it later, wishing for not the first nor last time that he could blog his troubles into metaphor-riddled and allegorical oblivion like Pete seemed to do so often.

They spent the rest of the morning going from flower shop to flower shop, looking for the perfect flowers because Pete refused get roses of any kind. Something about how he'd brought all the good colors for Ashlee at some point already. In the last shop, when he'd rattled off a list of flowers for a bouquet according to Victorian flower meanings found via his iPhone and Google, he'd paused and looked very hard at Patrick. Normally, Patrick would roll his eyes and say something witty but this look was different, just that long ago smile had been. Pete just grinned and asked the cashier for a piece of paper to scribble something down. Patrick assumed it would be sappy poetry for the card. The cashier's single glance at it before her eyes brimming with tender-hearted tears just confirmed it.

"You never change, do you?" Patrick asked with a roll of his eyes and a sincere, good-natured smile. "You're still my favorite sentimental idiot." Pete just smiled and wrapped him in a hug that smelled and felt a lot like the perfect he couldn't really have. Bronx giggled and waggled the daisy a cashier in another shop had given him at them. The entire day was shaping up to be something Patrick shouldn't have.

The candy shop went much faster, due to a sweet tooth he hadn't quite known Pete had and was apparently fostering in Bronx. The two of them picked out a wide selection of chocolates that Ashlee would have to like at least some of. Patrick just made sure neither consumed too much of anything sweet. His nerves would never handle the onslaught of both on a sugar high. He knew from experience and smiled at the memory of cakes, cookies, and sweeter-than-sin coffee. The idea that he couldn't have a day like this was starting to melt like the snow outside and the sticky chocolate on both Pete and Bronx's fingers.

The final stop before home ended up being a Hallmark store, where Pete brought a slew of pandas supposedly for his mother and a pair of kissing bears for Ashlee. "Ummm, Pete," Patrick really felt the need to point this out, "neither of you would ever blush because of something little like a PDA."

"Maybe, but the thought counts, right?" Patrick sighed and the cashier nodded exuberantly. Whether it was due to serving a 'rock star', getting a nice commission check soon enough because of this, or both was hard to say. Either way, he was extremely helpful and gave a discount on the black bear Bronx had grabbed and hugged and chewed without Patrick or Pete noticing. Patrick hadn't seriously thought about the unreality of the day since the fifth panda.

The trip back to Pete and Ashlee's was uneventful compared to the rest of the day. Ashlee had finally texted Patrick some time around the parking lot of the Hallmark store and Patrick had tapped out a quick reply as Pete strapped Bronx into his car seat. Patrick was a little surprised when she insisted that he stay for dinner and dessert but it meant that he got to see the surprised look on her face when the bouquet arrived.

"Oh, Pete, they're beautiful!" she exclaimed. "And not a single rose in sight! You remembered!" She plucked out the card, read it, nose crinkling in amusement as she read what had to be sad sap Wentz-brand poetry, and she leaned over to give Pete a heartbreaking but chaste kiss on the cheek. Patrick had the distinct feeling he'd be asked to babysit tonight but apparently he was mistaken, since he walked out the front door of the Simpson-Wentz home with nothing but a container of leftovers and some of the peanut butter and chocolate mousse tart dessert Ashlee adamantly refused to reveal the secret of. Patrick was fairly certain it had come from a bakery.

The drive back to his apartment was like the ending to any other day: generally Pete-less, unfulfilling, and disappointing in the extreme. Normally, he made it about as far as the living room before he wanted to tear everything apart in frustration. Tonight, he just hoped to make it through the front door so none of the certainly lurking paparazzi could see. He wasn't expecting the bouquet on his doorstep, a riot of yellows and whites erupting from an elaborate and overstuffed frosted glass vase and a huge sunflower shining in the middle. It made him pause just long enough to see the kissing bears Pete had told him had been for Ashlee and the card that stood next to them. Patrick couldn't help the smile that broke out on his face, he really couldn't, but he didn't exactly try very hard to either.

He picked up the flowers in their vase, inhaling their sweet scent, and cuddled the bears and card close to his heart. He didn't have to read the card to know that Pete had sent them but he would dutifully read it anyway. At least it wasn't as grand and elaborate as it could be. When he read the card, he'd still be able to cope with the inevitable heartbreak. That's just how things with Pete went: a fast high and a long fall down.

He was honestly surprised to find no joke inside, no prank of any kind. Instead it was a beautiful script that could have never been written by Pete's hands.

_The time is right to put my arms around you._   
_You're feeling right,_   
_You wrap your arms around too._   
_But suddenly, I feel the shining sun._   
_Before I knew it, this dream was all gone._   
__   
_-missing thorns_   
_(because of you)_

  
Patrick knew what he had to do. Sure, it was a horrible cliched thing but Pete had forced his hand in the most adorably romantic way possible. He picked up his cell phone, still grinning like a loon, and typed out a quick text.

_we'll make this dream come true_

  
He dropped the phone and turned his attention back to the bouquet and bears. Somehow, the little magnets in their muzzles had attracted and both were blushing bright red. Both, through some deal only Pete could negotiate without anyone noticing, were wearing boy's overalls and one had a hat. He gave the bouquet a place of honor on his kitchen island counter, fluffing the flowers to look fuller like he'd seen on TV. He then arranged the still smooching bears in front of the vase and stood back to admire the effect. Just as his smile was starting to hurt, his phone buzzed.

The reply was a little unexpected, since Patrick was still certain that Pete would be doing what Pete seemed to do best with his admittedly attractive wife. Even in the face of what looked to be evidence that he felt something more than what best friends usually felt for each other.

_wll u stll luv me n th mrng?_

_4evr + evr babe. come tomorrow?_

_k. strbks?_

_u know how i like it_

_hpe i get 2 kno more_

  
Patrick just blushed and grabbed his laptop before heading to his room. He wanted to know just what each of those flowers meant. And even if this turned out to be a joke or a dream or a nightmare, he'd always still love him in the morning.

**Author's Note:**

> End Notes:
> 
> * Patrick's Bouquet  
>  -Yellow chrysanthemums=secret admirer  
>  -White chrysanthemums=truth  
>  -Yellow tulips=hopelessly in love  
>  -Forget-Me-Nots=remember me forever  
>  -Gladiolus=strength of character  
>  -Aster=contentment  
>  -Sunflower=adoration  
>  -Black-Eyed Susans=encouragement.  
>  Yeah, it's bloody blindingly yellow and white.
> 
> * The bears are limited(-ish) ones from the Hallmark store. They're as ridiculously cute in real life as I hope they sound in this.
> 
> * Lyrics in the card and Patrick's first text are from Daft Punk's "Digital Love", which is about all I've got as far as sappy love songs go. Pete's way of saying 'I love you too, everything about you, and never did come up with a good way of telling you so could you maybe make the first move?'/'I want to scream "I love you" from the top of my lungs, but I'm afraid that someone else might here me'. Or at least it does in my head. It's probably not nearly as obvious as I think it is.
> 
> * The next two texts are from Click/that song in the movie.
> 
> * The peanut butter and chocolate tart (since Pete keeps mentioning how much he likes peanut butter and chocolate) is actually from a shop called Naked Chocolate. If you can find one, go in and devour something ASAP. I suggest the aforementioned tart, the fruit drinks, the hot chocolate (literally molten chocolate), the fondue, the sundaes, the apple lemonade, and the personal cakes/giant cupcakes.


End file.
